“The only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well.” Alfred Adler
She is organized, but can’t quite relax. He is joyous, but procrastinates. She is an expert on food but struggles with her weight. He is a wealth of knowledge but finds social situations difficult. She is intuitive but anxious. He seems to have everything except the perfect relationship. They have the perfect marriage but can’t seem to get their finances together.
We all have an imbalance, a quirk, a seeming lack of wholeness in some way.
And it used to frustrate the hell out of me.
We naturally seek to self improve, to grow, to make sense of things, and we look to others as a benchmark of the success we seek. Maybe we are intrigued by a public figure or celebrity, or hope to find our hero in someone we know. We get into the cooking show mentality and look for the perfect ‘after’ as we work on our ‘before’. It used to frustrate me that I could never really find one. No one seemed to have that balance we all hope to strike.
But I’ve realized that I was looking at it wrong.
I always believed that we are connected, but was still holding the idea of separation.
A mosaic is made of colourful pieces, each different, each beautiful and each imperfect in a way that allows them to fit so perfectly together. Like us. That wonderful mosaic can only work because the pieces are a little chipped, they’re a little imbalanced.
They all bring something – not everything.
That mosaic is like our friendships, families, our brotherhoods, sisterhoods or communities. We are drawn together for the strengths that we bring to the whole – because we’re not meant to do this alone.
You might be strong in an area I am weak. I might be wise in an area you want to grow. He might be excelling in an area I want to learn from. She might be brave about something that scares him. He might teach her something she needs just by being who he is.
We all inspire, even as we are inspired, because we really are meant to be connected. As friends or family or people we pass in our day to day lives – we play a role for each other.
I was trying to find the whole in separation, but it was never there to find. It was in togetherness. That’s where we thrive, where our vibrant strengths and quirky imperfections come together as a mosaic. And it is beautiful indeed.
Copyright Nirvana Dawson 2012